Autobiography of Zaid Hamid: Part4 of From Indus to Oxus [PDF Download]

Dear Children, their fathers, forefathers and our great Soudi Arabian Ancestors,

It is with great honour that we are going to announce our ideology of Ghazwa e hind in this fourth part of our sex story “From Indus to Oxus“.

Great prophet Sheikh Yusuf Kazab Al Jahanumi who went to Janat to “un-virgin” all the virgin boys. The demise of our there to run Gayhad against women, made us really disappointed and sad. After seeing him in our dream, we again became hopeful that boss (May Lanat and Virgin boys be upon him) might leave some virgins for us too to allure more Taliban members in our Gayhad. Our boss was wearing such an Inqilabi underwear in our dream that our eyes were totally outshined and seeing his posture and hearing crazy Azans from his Inqilabi underwear made our Gayhad senses alive and running.

We wanted to take his picture but since we were afraid Zionists and SAFMA might use those pictures to create Gayhadis against us. We stopped. Very soon Hamid Mir met us, with his profound white Gayhadi look we got impressed. We thought he’d fall for our intimate charms and our Laal Topi esp with our matching Laal underwear in sight but he denied helping us. Instead he shown his interest in our dear Suckeena biwi. We couldn’t help but offer our love for getting Holy Virgin land of Hind filled with Virgin Hindu baniyas of all sizes and shapes. He told us a lot of conspiracy theories esp this theory that our govt supported Zionists to convert our cat Pooka into a Jew. He also told us a couple of things regarding CIA. Especially his new warning to our Gayhadis

“WARNING Don’t go to the bathroom on May 11th. CIA intelligence reports that a major plot is planned for that day. Anyone who goes #2 on the 11th will be bitten on the ass by an alligator. Reports indicate that organized groups of alligators are planning to rise up into unsuspecting Taliban’s toilet bowls and bite them when they are doing their dirty business.” He said he usually keeps this stuff secret, but he got this information from a reliable source. It came from a friend of a friend whose cousin is dating this girl whose brother knows this guy whose wife knows this lady whose husband buys hotdogs from this guy who knows a shoeshine guy who shines the shoes of a mailroom worker who has a friend who’s drug dealer sells drugs to another mailroom worker who works in the CIA building.”

The news of this conspiracy theory scared us so much that it made our Inqilabi underwear wet. But before we could wash it and do Ghusal and upload it on our brasstack website to inform our friends and Gayhadis, a terrible accident happened. What we though of as an alligator was infact a SEAL of CIA leading to another loss about which we’ll write in fifth part.

Till then May Great Khaiyr be Upon all of us.

Your Green Eyed and Red Underweared Mujahid,
Chacha Zaid Kazab al Fitna tul Inqilabi chadi wala choza

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